small change: your relationship grid


small change 


Ciarán Fenton

How small changes in your behaviour will have a big impact on how you work, lead or follow

That’s the working title of a book I’m writing, initially as a series of short blogs.

Blog 1 small change: seven principles

Blog 2 small change: your career is a unique business

Blog 3 small change: your soft balance sheet

Blog 4 small change: your D Liability

Blog 5 small change: your timeline

Blog 6 small change: your formative years

Blog 7 small change: your A asset

Blog 8 small change: your career equity

Blog 9 small change: your curriculum vitae

Blog 10 small change: your emotional intelligence

Blog 11 small change: your reputation

Blog 12 small change: you, three years from now

Blog 13 small change: your purpose, strategy & behaviour (PSB)

Blog 14 small change: your soft p&l

Blog 15 small change: your 7 career options

Blog 16 small change: your relationship grid


Seven principles

Principle 1

Your career is

  • a unique business,
  • one over seven billion in its uniqueness


Blog 16  small change: your relationship grid

your relationship grid

Managing relationships is your personal “core business”.

The Relationship Gridis a “tool” I developed, initially to help clients who signed for my First 100 Days Programme to avoid “Red” relationships in those critical days, and then they found that the Grid is useful at any time.

Here are the steps to populating your relationship grid:

Column 1 Key relationships

List all your key relationships, starting with yourself, then your family – a line each for each person, and not just “my family”; your boss, your peers by name – a line each; your team, if you have one, again by name, and so on to include key clients or stakeholders until you feel you have covered every key relationship.

Column 2 Their PSB/Success?/Failure?

Write short notes in respect of each name:

What is their PSB? If you don’t know it, find out.

What constitutes success or failure in respect of your purpose with respect to each relationship?

Column 3 Red? Amber? Green? (RAG)

Now “RAG” each relationship as of today:

  • RED = the relationship is very poor at the moment
  • AMBER = the relationship could go RED unless you take remedial action
  • GREEN = the relationship is good at this time

Repeat this exercise at regular intervals.


  • Do you have any REDs or AMBERs today?
  • How can you turn the REDs to GREEN and prevent the AMBERs from turning RED?
  • Is your relationship with yourself GREEN?

In respect of the last, if not – why not?


Ciarán Fenton




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